When I started Tina's Place way back when, I didn't know what the fuck I was doing! I quickly found a little niche with the crafting blogs. It felt good, I had a purpose even. Something happened along the way, that I think happens quite often with not only moms, but women in general...I started to lose my path, my fire, my passion...for EVERYTHING. My sewing machine is collecting dust, I usually only bake for special occasions these days, and I just could not(and still haven't) find something I can be passionate about. I have been struggling to carve out a new path for myself, and it sucks. I hate this lost feeling that I wake up with almost daily.
That being said, I'm certainly not giving up! I have been trying to see things in a new light. See my struggles as gifts. As shitty as my struggles are, they will get me to the place I want to be some day. Its a slow process, though. I am so tired of striving to be what other people are. I don't want to be like THEM...I want to be like ME!
Some things that I have started implementing on my journey:
*Working out because I WANT to, and it feels good...not because a program tells me I HAVE to!
*Not restricting what I eat...back to good 'ole moderation!
...these two have been tough for me. I have always done better(by "better" I mean, lost weight) on a strict program with specific guidelines. Let's face it...the programs I have tried are NOT sustainable. Seriously, the SECOND you tell me I can't have something I want it even more than I ever did pre "life style change"! If programs work for you, that's fuckin' great, but for me they're not realistic.
*I started a gratitude journal. I firmly believe that what you put out is what you get in return. Being a Debbie Downer day in and day out is just no way to live. I'm trying to put a positive spin on everything...and I mean EVERYTHING.
Which brings me to:
*Mantras! You know, "start each day with a positive thought"-type shit. Some mornings I forget...I mean, I AM trying to create a new habit here. Rome wasn't built in a day. The mornings that I do remember to say even just one positive thing, (or insert a few throughout my day) I can honestly say I go to bed at night with a more peaceful heart.
I know this is a little random, but fuck it. Maybe I'll be back, maybe I won't...but its OK either way.
"I express gratitude for all the good in my life. Each day brings wonderful new surprises."